12 weeks ANC checkup

Alhamdulillah, last week masa 12 weeks, ada checkup. Aku makin nak habis 1st trimester makin kuat meloya. Ya Allah AKu tatau what to do dah. Aku lapar ke haper ni. Nak makan tak lalu sangat. tapi kalau lapar sampai ketor2 tangan dan lutut tu hahaha. Perangai. I can only eat in small portions. Tapi kerap. so memang aku sokmo ler ada dkt dining table tu. Munching on something. Alahai makyong. 

oh back to the checkup. Aku kan suker my visit to Sunfert. Sebab 1st of all, nak tgk baby la kan. Kedua Sunfert ni dkt Bangsar South. Jauhla sikit dr rumah. So masa PKP ni, kalau dapat naik kereta jauh-jauh sikit seronok sgt rasa. Ketiga Sunfert ni tempatnya comfortable and super nice and ada banyak kedai-kedai dkt bawah tu. So dptla aku beli tealive ke, sandwhiches or food yang best-best. Hihihi. Tapaw makan dlm kereta pon happy dah sebab dapat keluar kan. 

Bila masuk je bilik doc, check BP tinggi sikit 140/110 padahal dkt rumah tak pernah tinggi. Then berat dah naik sikit. Hari tu turun 2kg ++ . Kemudian doc pon masuk dan scan. Nampak kepala, ada tulang hidung, baby pon dok terpusing pusing eiii geramnya. Kemudian doc cakap, tu tengok dia tgh lambai U. hihihi. Aku ada shoot video dia masa tu. Doc ckp tulang belakang dan ketebalan kulit belakang pon nampak ok. So takperlulah buat NICC test nampak baby ok, takde down syndrome. Alhamdulillah. Sebab b4 that kami taknak buat  test tu. Masa Farhan dulu tak buat juga. NICC ni blood test utk check kromosom baby. Ada down syndrom ke tak. Alhamdulillah. So far so good. Happy je nampak baby lambai-lambai, sebelum checkup masa sembang-sembang dgn Farhan aku cakapla.

Nanti baby lambai-lambaila mama dgn abg ye. Nanti mama amek video tunjuk dkt abg. 

Alhamdulillah Allah gerakkan tangan dia nampak dlm video ultrasound tu. Eiii sukernyerrr.

Lepas tu Doc plan utk my Cervical Cerclage Appointment. Allahu. dah sampai timenya ya. Doc arrange date dan ckp in a month time akan buat the procedure. So at 16 weeks akan ikat. Before buat the procedure aku kena buat Swab test (again!) di Sunway Medical Center 2 days prior to the procedure. Then check in, puasa then ptg tu buat the procedure. Nervous jugakla for sure. But I will have another checkup 1 week b4 the procedure. Hopefully semuanya dimudahkan. Now tengah kumpul duit, tarik sana-sini utk cukupkan for the procedure. Sebab procedure ni tak covered by company insurance. Whatever it takes, baby. Whatever it takes.

Pregnancy Test

Assalamualaikum wbh.

The last time i did the test was during my 2nd pregnancy. Memang positive. But I lost it at 9 weeks. So memang tak pernah la test dah kan. This time around lepas dah tau pregnant from the blood test, rasa nak jugak buat pregnancy test. So I asked Ed to buy for me. 

By the way did I tell you, that aku tak drive, aku tak keluar mana2 sangat kecuali gi checkup je. the rest dok rumah dan banyakkan baring je. Makan pon banyak order dan kalau dah jemu sgt masak simple2 jer. Cuma this time around bed rest tak sorang2. I have Farhan with me. Hari2 tanya adik besar mana dah ma. Macamla ada besa saiz tu in a day hahaha. 

So one morning masa Ed dah pegi kerja, aku buatla test tu. Nervous jugak. Kenapa entah. Memang mintak Ed belikan hat Clear Blue tu. So bila dapat je result I was ecstatic. Eiiii sukernyer. Senyum2 je sorang-sorang. Tapi bila tgk dkt bawah tu dia tulis 3 weeks aku nervous balik. Sebab how come 3 weeks je. I should be 6 weeks plus by then.  I was driving myself crazy. Apsal ni. Adik ok ke? Ke stop growing ke? Macam-macam jugak perkara negatif dalam kepala aku masa tu. Yelah aku masih ada trauma of the 2nd pregnancy loss tu kan 

Then aku tanya Dong. Dong masa tu tgh kerja kot so lambat sikit dia respond. Adui aku kejap-kejap tgk phone. Mana dong tak jawab-jawab lagi ni. Then aku dapat jawapan. 

Memanglaaa Cekna. Kan dia tulis dah dkt instruction tu. The Maximum weeks that the test will display is 3 weeks. So kalau ko 5 ke 10 ke 15 weeks pon max dia boleh display 3 weeks je. 

Owhh hahahha. Ok alhamdulillah. Syukur. Lega aku. So baby, we are officially pregnant ok.

8 weeks pregnant and 2nd antenatal checkup

 Asslamualaikum wbh, 

Last week ada antenatal checkup. As always aku berdebar nak giler kalau checkup. Aku rasa trauma loosing the previous pregnancy at 9 weeks masih menghantui kot. Waited for Ed to fetch me. Dia kerja. So lepas lunch off we went to Bangsar South.  Sekarang tunggu sekejap je. Less than 30 minutes mesti dah dpt jumpa Dr.Wong.

Kali ni yg scan aku was Caroline. Caroline ni sonographer dr Sunway Medical Center. Kenal dia masa buat treatment Farhan dulu. So she scanned, and showed me.  

Ok dah nampak shape kepala. Air ketuban dah nampak. Saiz ok. 7 weeks 2 days. Masa tu aku 7 weeks 3 days. Ok lets try to listen it hearbeat. 

Dup..dup..dup laju kemahen heartbeat baby. Allahu excitednya. Alhamdulillah. 155 heartbeat. Kata doc Wong, baby is progressing well. Masa dengar heartbeat baby tu I have the biggest grin on my face. 

So after that we discuss pasal next step. so aku kena maintain makan ubat, guna ubat insert cyclogest tu twice a day and hiprogin injections, every 4 days. Kata doctor kalau orang lain dia dah stopkan ubat. sebab kes aku special sikit maka dia akan maintain all those meds dan hormones until at least 10 weeks. InsyaAllah aku ok je nak maintain makan ubat, masukkan hormon dan jab hormon, asalkan baby sihat dan selamat. Dr. Wong juga discuss utk pasang cerclage(ikat pangkal rahim) pada week 15 nanti. It's Ok. Whatever it takes baby. 

Ed sampai amek gambar aku dkt hospital tu sebab aku dok sengih sorang2 happy.  Then send the pic to group family. 

So now alhamdulillah Aku dah 8 weeks pregnant, alhamdulillah. Aku mula la tatahan certain smell. Ada hari-hari tu aku dok dlm rumah armed with fabreze. Bau busuk sikit aku spray fabreze. BIla tak jumpa fabreze tu aku spray perfume aku jap Tommy Girl jap DKNY. bahahha.  Lantokla janji tak busuk. Aku pulak takde morning sickness. tapi aku ada evening and night sickness. Lepas asar karang mulalah aku meloya. tu yg aku selalu tido time tu. Ed kalau balik kejer je mesti aku tgh tido. Haih nasib baiklah aku WFH, and normally my meetings, discussion dgn team belah pagi, or lepas zohor. By 4.30 selalunya dah settle. so bolehla aku layan meloya tu. So aku tak yah la amek cuti or mc sangat masa ni. but masa lepas embryo transfer hr tu aku memang cuti 2 minggu. Nak fokus malas nak stress. 

Aku dah carik2 maternity and baby punya website. Saje je nak senyum-senyum, happy2. idokla nak beli apa-apa lagi. Tengok botol susu pon senyum hahahaha. terima kasih Allah. Ya Allah lindungilah kandunganku, berilah kesihatan yg baik pada baby and mama, dan permudahkanlah urusan pregnancy dan delivery nanti ya Allah. Hanya padaMu kami bermohon. Mohon doa kawan-kawan juga ye. tqvm. 

23 Disember 2020 : 1st Antenatal Checkup

Semenjak dapat feedback daripada Dr Wong from last visit. Aku sangat-sangat anxious. Risau sangat-sangat. Aku memang follow betul-betul jadual makan ubat, insert ubat dan jab. Masa pregnancy kedua tahun 2015 dulu, aku rasa kami rilex sangat dan over confident. Aku kejer cam biasa once dapat confirmation dah pregnant, dan ada masa-masanya terbabas waktu untuk pakai ubat dan jab, which is a big no-no utk pregnancy thru IVF ni. So this time around, aku memang tak take things for granted. Actually aku tulis tau pasal pregnance 2nd tu. tapi aku delete most of it, when we lost he baby at 9 weeks. 

Memang banyak-banyak2kan berdoa je kami. Aku hari-hari dok menggelisah kerisauan. Aku dah mula tak leh makan pedas dan rasa nak heartburn start last week lagi. Tekak aku memang tak leh makan pedas, kemabang semacam. Kepala gatal giler, jerawat dkt muka dan badan dah mula ada, and my breast is really sore, cam kena pukul je. Ada hari2 rasa cramping sikit. tapi takde spotting lagi, unlike my 2 previous pregnancy. 

Hari ni ada checkup dekat Sunfert. At 2.45 off we went to Bangsar South. Walaupun org ckp jauh la and so on. From our house, the medical centre is so accessible, terus masuk mex dan NPE pastu sampai. Tak sempat masuk jem. Aku masa ni memang dah tak leh bercakap, tak leh senyum dah masa ni. Gi toilet entah berapa kali. Ed buat lawak pon tak layan dah. My heart was pumping soo hard. risaunya Ya Allah, berilah kesihatan yg baik pada anak kami. 

Then my turn came and the nurse asked me to pee first. I did that and dah get ready for the checkup. Doctor Wong scan, our eyes on the screen and I can see the circle in the screen. 

DW : oh, apa orang melayu cakap, Alhamdulillah!

Aku : Alhamdulillah. (tears in my eyes)

DW : Looking Good. dah nampak thru scan. ada sack with yolk, and the size pon ok. The baby has catched up. Dia slower starter but very good now. This is terrific. 

Aku : Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah. 

Then he talked to us both after the examination

DW : Congratulations, you are pregnant. I am very happy for you. I pon nak update my team, about this. This is why we have to go all the way, and never give up. Absolutely terrific. 

Us : Thank you doc. So baby dah semakin sihat? Dah reach its milestone?

DW : Yup. your HCG reading was low last time. thats why saya tak mahu you proceed with another blood test. This time around should be able to see the sac and yolk thru the scan. And it did. Very good. So continue what you are doing right now, we continue all the support. And i'll see you on 4th January. 

Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah. Terima kasih ya Allah, atas rezekimu.  Lepas tu keluar amek meds semua. And i finally can smile and talk. Syukur ya Allah. Terima kasih pada kawan-kawan yang mendoakan.  As always tak ramai yang tahu, di peringkat awal-awal ni. But pada yang tahu, thanks for the dua. I really appreciate it, and we really need it. Masih awal lagi ni, dan masih panjang perjalanan ni, but I will be thankful for every milestone Allah has bestowed me.  Thank you Allah. 

15 Dec 2020 - 2nd Beta HcG Test

Assalamualaikum wbh, 

Hari ni 2nd Beta HCG test which is 2nd pregnancy test. I did the first test last week on 11th Dec. Result was Positive. I am technically pregnant. However doc is a bit concerned that the reading was a bit on the low side. So she scheduled another test 4 days later which is today. During the 4 days i continued with all the meds and jabs. So today is the day. 

Pagi2  lagi dah gerak dari rumah, sebab kena sampai di Sunfert pada pukul 8. Alhamdulillah arrived at 8.02 am. Amek blood sample and have to wait for 2 hours for the result. Yg bosan sikit, the only kedai makan yg bukak is Starbucks, so terpaksa lah lepak dan makan sini, to kill 2 hours.  pukul 10.45 baru jumpa doc for the result.. Ya Allah semoga Allah kabulkan permintaan kami utk seorang lagi zuriat soleh. 

Farhan hari2 akan datang bari salam dekat adik dia. 

Assalamualaikum adik. 

Adik dok elok2 dalam tu ye, pegang mama kuat2. 

Nanti kita main sama2 tau. 

Then he bacakan fatihah utk adik dia. Allahu, syahdu sangat. Memang nak sangat adik si Farhan ni. Hari2 ada dialog dan senario dia dan adik, gitu gini. Memang tersentuh hati kalau tgk gaya dia. Kalau aku dan ed soh gi main dkt bilik dia, dia akan jawab. An pon nak duduk dekat adik. Biarla an baring sini. Alolo, oklah..oklah..

Aku memang anxious. every day akan anxious sangat. No matter how many times you lalui treatment ni, memang akan berdebar sangat. Ya Allah kabulkanlah doa kami, kuatkanlah janin ini, semoga menjadi anak soleh/solehah.

Kali ni checkup dengan Dr Wong. Bila masuk muka dia serius je, aduyai risaunya. 

DW : Ok kalau tengok the result memang reading ni you are pregnant. Kalau u buat pregnancy test dkt luar pon you akan dpt result pregnant. Cuma bacaan HcG ni rendah.  Here's the reading is 330. you should be nearing 1000 already by now. 

Aku terdiam. Ed pon sama. 

DW : The last time masa u miscarry was it like this?

Aku : Reading masa awal2 was OK, cuma then it stopped growing

DW : Ok, lets continue with the meds and support. There are cases where, the baby will catchup and grow as normal. I'll see you in a week. We don't need to do a blood test again. If its good then we can see the baby through the scan. 

Aku dah tak tahan nak nangis masa tu. Went outside and duduk kat luar. Aku dah start crying masa tu. Luckily we were all wearing face mask, so tak nampak la sangat tgh nangis, if not sure nampak hidung dan muka merah sgt tu. 

Ya Allah, I was devastated masa tu. Ed cakap. Com you are pregnant. the reading did double every 48 hours, cuma tak cukup tinggi je. Kita doa dan doa dan doa ok. 

Memang onwards tu, kami berdoa tak putus. Aku tgk Ed baca Yasin hari-hari. some days aku baca dengan dia. Most days aku baca siangnya while he is at work. Ya Allah kurniakanlah kami seorang lagi anak yang soleh dan sihat. Sihatkanlah anak dalam kandungan ini Ya Allah. Semoga kami dapat lihat dia next checkup nanti. Amin Ya Robb. 

Day 9 : Post Embryo Transfer

Pagi tadi Ed bawak aku gi amek jab dekat klinik dekat dengan rumah.  Setakat dalam the 2week-wait ni, ni kali kedua aku kena amek jab hormon. Hari2 akan ada ubat insert dan ubat utk dimakan. Kali ni aku buat reminder dan alarm di phone supaya aku tak lambat makan ubat. Memang disiplin giler kali ni. For your info ni kali ke 3 aku buat embryo Transfer. Pertama masa Farhan tahun 2012 masuk 3 embryo. Pregnant twins pada mulanya. Kedua masa tahun 2015, masuk 2 embryo, berjaya pregnant tapi lost it at 9 weeks. Dan kali ni 2020 1 embryo dan semoga berjaya pregnant jugak. 

Lepas embryo transfer baru ni, keesokannya embryologist called and informed me that the last embryo didnt make it to the blastocyst stage. embryo tu takmo matang. so they informed me that they cannot freeze it. no point pon dan they will discard it. I was crushed. actually mixed feeling sebenarnya.

1. Kalau it made it - kena bayar RM1600 to freeze it, and RM1200  annual maintenance. Perit sikit sebab dah spend belas ribu so far. Pastu terpikir err kalau dah simpan maksudnya nak kena transfer again ke, umur dah berapa ni. Neves pulak aku.

2. If it doesnt make it - then this is the last chance. This is it. Adus pressure pulak. 

So now kami dah dapat tahu, that from the frozen cycle. This is the last embryo. Aku mc for 2 weeks. tapi kali ni x se relax masa farhan dulu where aku bebetul boleh bed rest dan baca novel je. This time susah sikit nak rehat camtu. Sebab kali ni  dah ada anak sorang, where dia ada kelas lagi, nak urus makan minum dia etc. Keduanya kali ni mama dah stay dengan aku, dan dia masih lagi recovering dari surgery patah tangan dia tu. So dia tak leh masak2 sangat. So aku masak ler jugak. Pastu aku dah pindah rumah baru where servis food panda takde dkt sini. Adala servis Grab but u knowla bapok mahal Grab ni. !Sekali sekala ok. Meriah juga rumah kami, ramai yg datang, alhamdulillah. Mak mertua pon datang ni dah seminggu dok sini. Semoga ramai2  mendoakan kami dapat baby.

Oh lupa nak cakap, esok is the pregnancy test. Ya Allah berdebarnya Ya Allah. saspen sangat. Setakat 9 days ni, aku mmg cramping sangat2 sejak day 3. Tak leh makan lambat rasa cam heartburn. Breast are very sore. Muka sembab dan gerutu sikit haha. Takde spotting macam masa Farhan dulu, oemji saspennya. Tolong doakan ye. 

Frozen Embryo Transfer Day

Frozen Embryo Transfer (FET)

Salam, bertahun dah tak update blog. A lot has happened since. Yg life changing to the whole world is Covid 19, PKP 1.0 dan PKP 2.0 . Aku also dah bekerja di office semula, since 2017. Sold my business right before PKP, alhamdulillah for that. Since dalam PKP again, we decided that its a good time to do an FET sebab memang work from home kan. Tak yah renyah-renyah masuk office dan apply cuti or MC. 

 2 Dec 2020, aku ke Sunfert utk buat proses Frozen Embryo transfer. my last two embryos dah diunfreeze 2 hari lepas. Kali ni, ada penggunaan teknologi baru, where the embryos are cultured to blastocyst stage. Aku ada balance 2 lagi embryos. Advantage of blastocyst stage are as below :

Masa checkup pada 25 Nov hari tu, Doc cakap, dinding rahim tidaklah perfect, tp boleh proceed ke next stage. Selepas consultation dengan Doc, disebabkan faktor umur serta aku ada incompetant servix, dia tak galakkan masukkan 2 embrio. Dia nak elakkan daripada pregnant twins. dan dia hanya akan pilih embrio yg sampai stage blastocyst. Kalau dua2 berjaya, dia akan freezekan semula lagi 1.

Masa sampai pada hari transfer tu, kami duduk for consultation with the head of embryologist. Menurut dia. 1 dari embryo berjaya sampai ke blastocyst stage. 1 lagi belum sampai ke stage tu, dan they will observe till tomorrow. Kalau sampai to the stage, they will inform and freeze it. Kalau tak sampai ke stage tu, the embryo deemed tak fit dan will be discarded.  but for today, ada 1 yg healthy for the transfer. 

Macam dulu2 hari ET, tak boleh pakai sabun, pakai syampu, deodaran, perfume, lotion or makeup. Lepas consultation, dah masuk ke ward utk prep. Dah tukar baju, scan dulu, whether dah full bladder atau tak. Nurse cakap belum full. So dia mintak minum 2 cup of water. Nak buat transfer kena full bladder. br scan boleh nampak kat mana nak place the embryo. 2 kali jugak scan tak cukup penuh, but the second time tu nurse tu mintak aku jalan je dlm my ward jgn baring dan jgn minum extra. So aku jalan la keliling katil dlm 15 minutes sampai naik dizzy.  After that dah masuk OT. I forgot how painful it was, aduyai memang tersentak2 kaki tahan sakit. But maybe the technology is better and the doc and the team is more experienced, everything completed in 15 minutes gitu. 

After that I was wheeled out, dan baring 30 minutes dgn katil ditilt sikit supaya kaki aku lebih tinggi dr kepala. Alhamdulillah procedure berjalan lancar. dan kami pon balik ke rumah. Dekat rumah, geram je tengok barang tak habis kemas, sebab baru sangat pindah rumah a few days ago, tapi kena pejam mata jelah for the next few weeks, to ensure the safety of this baby. Farhan excitednya. Hari-hari sembang dengan my tummy. Hari-hari akan fikirkan aktiviti dengan adik dia, dan senario-senario atau what adik dia akan buat or cakap. Syahdu kadang tu. nak sangat adik. Ya Allah semoga Allah kurniakan kami seorang lagi cahaya mata. Kabulkanlah permintaan kami dan Farhan. Doakan ye kawan-kawan.