Wednesday, May 2, 2012

10 weeks checkup

Assalamualaikum wbh kawan-kawan,

Sorrylah lambat sikit update pasal checkup tu. Weekend tu banyak keluar jugak. Pastu cuti Labor Day tu keluar jugak beli barang tah haper-haper. Keluar sekejap jek dalam 2 jam. Terbaring sampai petang lepas tu penat. Semenjak banyak kena bedrest ni aku memang kurang stamina sikit. Hmmmm. 

Anyways, berbalik kepada my checkup Last Friday. Its my 10th week checkup. Aku memanjang nervous kalau checkup ni. Bila aku cakap dekat Ed aku takut, dia pon kata, takut jugak. Hehe. Selalunya dia tenang gila kan. But semenjak pregnant ni dia pon ada sesdikit anxiety jugak. 

Appointment aku petang lepas Jumaat. As always Ed la bawakkan. Actually aku ada tulis 2-3 entry lepas aku confirm pregnant at 4 weeks tu. Tapi sebab masa tu tak conclusive lagi, maka aku peram dulu. Lepas tu bila dah confirm, aku rasa sedih pulak bila baca balik. So sebab aku taknak ada reminder sedih-sedih dekat blog ni, aku tak jadikla publish. Instead aku bagi in point form jek what happened. Actuallynya aku:
  • Malas nak cerita that during my first ultrasound, the sonographer showed us two sack with two yolks which means at that point of time I was carrying twins.
  • Malas jugak nak cerita how me and Ed was grinning from ear to ear when we knew we are pregnant with twins
  • Malas nak cerita jugak how during week 6 I was bleeding again.  And this time is with red blood and boleh tahan banyak. Panik, nangis sakan, we rushed to the hospital and was given a jab. Scanned and saw the babies are ok. Twin A already has a heart beat masa tu. Ya Allah, macam tak percaya. Whilst, doc said twin B will have it’s own heartbeat in a day or two
  • Lagi malas nak citer that bila sampai rumah, aku dok tengok jek gambar ultrasound tu. Bila tunjuk dekat Ed dia tengok gitu-gitu jek. But when he thought I wasn’t looking, he was staring at the ultrasound pic with a smile. Hahaha. 
At 7 weeks kami pergi scan sekali lagi dan the sonographer kata Twin B macam stopped growing. Twin A saiznya 7 week ++ whilst Twin B 6 weeks ++. Bila keluar dari scan tu aku dah nak nangis. Kita loose 1 twin ke Com? aku tanya Ed, Ed cakap, kita tatau lagi. Tunggu Dr cakap apa. Bila masuk dalam bilik Dr, he confirmed that we are down to 1 baby. Bila Dr Wong nampak aku dah berair mata masa tu. He said 



Dr.Wong : Look, maybe baby ni tak sihat sangat, sebab tu he stopped growing. The other looks very healthy with good heart beat and good size. That’s why bila buat ET kami selalu masukkan 3 embryos, now you loose 2 but you have 1 good healthy one.

Memang aku nangis bila masuk kereta. Aku sangat excited when I know that I am carrying twins. Tapi aku tak cerita kat ramai orang sebab aku tau risiko having twins, apatah lagi if conceived thru IVF. 


Aku : Baby kita sorang dah takde, com.
Ed : Dia tak sihat kot com. Tak konklusif lagi kot. We can still see the sac.
Aku : Doc kata dah takde.
Ed : Baby, baby hold on ok. Baby jaga adik tu. Sampaila ketentuan dia sampai. (sambil gosok-gosok perut aku.)
Aku : Allah tau apa yang baik untuk kita kan. Maybe badan na pon tak kuat nak carry twins kot.
Ed : Betul, Allah lagi tau apa yang terbaik utk kita.
  
Bila balik rumah, aku delete semua bookmark aku pasal twin pregnancy dan sebagainya. Tapi masa aku baca2 tu ada pulak aku terbaca pasal kadang-kadang one of the twin tu lambat sikit nampak heartbeat. Baru 7 weeks kan. So masa tu aku still menyimpan harapan that Twin B will make it. 

Last Friday which is at 10 weeks checkup, its confirmed. I lost 1 baby. Twin B memang dah shrink masa tu. Boleh baca pasal the Vanishing Twin Syndrom, untuk faham what happened. Aku dah memang prepared. So no more tears this time. Lagipun I don't wanna loose sight. Kami buat IVF sebab nak conceive. Tak pernah terpikir nak dapat twins. Kalau dapat memang bonus sangat kan. Tapi pregnant ni pun dah syukur sangat-sangat ye tak. 

Okay, on to the good news. Baby is doing great. With 177 heartbeat. Lajunya jantung baby! hehehe Ed sengih-sengih jek masa tu. Lepas tu aku tanya, tu tangan dengan kaki dia ke? Yes, the sonographer said. Hihihi, sukanya. Comella tangan baby. Ed terus makin semangat menengok skrin bila nampak kaki dan tangan baby. Yey! Suka-suka. 

Lepas tu gi jumpa Dr.Wong. Tanya soalan-soalan sikit. Dan dia akan stopkan Cyclogest pessaries, hormon progestron tu. Mula-mula happy jugak sebab tak yah pakai ubat tu kan. Tapi lepas tu risau pulak jadinya sebab  progestron tu diguna to support the pregnancy kan. Yelah bukan pregnant natural kan, so takut body tak produce sufficient hormon to support the pregnancy. I just have to trust that the Dr knows what he is doing dan serahkan semuanya pada Allah. Yakinlah cekna, Allah akan lindung the baby. Selama ni pon Allah yang lindung ye tak. Bukannya ubat-ubat tu semua kan. So my checkup is in 3 weeks, eh 2 weeks je kot. Esok aku dah masuk 11 weeks pregnant. Ya Allah lindungilah kami Ya Allah. Doakan semuanya selamat ye kawan-kawan.

37 comments:

  1. Teringat masa i lost my 2nd baby, the drama in the dr room...sedih giler..dah 8 bulan masa tu tapi he was gone before sempat menatap wajah ibunya :'(

    Tapi bila fikir balik, Allah knows the best. Mungkin baby x sihat. ?kalau dia hidup pun maybe dia sakit or x sempurna..dan mungkin kami jua x mampu utk hadapinya..mungkin...sebab tu Allah amik balik..redha dan pasrah pada ketentuan Allah tu je yg aku boleh cakap. Mmg sejak dari tu rasa susPEN JEK masa ngandungkan yaya..every 2 weeks pegi scan.
    Doalah byk byk cekna..kerana semuanya dgn izin Allah..insyaAllah baby ko okayyyy...dont be carried away sgt dgn the lost ok.

    Kalau blh tiap malam buatla solat hajat, semoga baby kekal sihat dan selamat sehingga lahir ke dunia ni..since ko duduk rumah rajin rajinla solat dhuha gak moga dimurahkan rezeki anak yg sihat, comel etc etc utk ko dan ed..insyaAllah.

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    1. Thanks sis. Masa ko lost baby at 8 months tu ada symptom tak? Saje je nak tau. Betul, aku ni kena giat lagi berdoa dan buat solat sunat. Mintak Allah lindung baby ni dan permudahkan semuanya.

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  2. When I was 20 wks pregnant, baby scan showed that her right ventricle (brain) was enlarged. Pastu tah apa ratio leg n arm lari. I was so prepared to welcome a special child into this world but alhamdulillah with lots of duas n solat hajat she was born healthy. Masa pregnant tu mmg emotional...kenkdg marah dekat tuhan, dahla nak dapat baby susah, pas tu...so, my advice, banyak2 doa n tawakal. Sorry, terover pulak.
    Makbulu

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    1. Owh ye ker sis. saspennya lah kan kalau cam tu. Alhamdulillah semuanya selamat dan sihat je ye. Ok will increase my du'as, and solat hajat. Thanks for sharing

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  3. insyaallah u and the baby(babies) will be fine. aminn

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  4. nonie doakan semoga Allah berikan yg terbaik for both of you & the baby ;). rasanya most pregnant mommies mmg akan nervous jer time check up, doa jer selalu baby gonna be fine & in ur case lagila extra nervous kan. sebab tu time pregnant i always avoid watching or reading materials related to special babies ke apa, bukanla nak selfish ke apa... mmg amat2 simpati dgn mereka, tapi nanti bila baca @ tgk, i'll be extra worried & extra sedih, was trying to be positive as much as possible.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Nonie,
      Tulah I memang selective sikit bila bab baca2 kat internet ni. Taknak nanti extra anxious dan risau pulak kan. Banyak baca yang happy2 jek hehehe. Walaupun risau nak gila kan.

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  5. Cekna.. I will alwiz pray that your pregnancy will be doing great all the way until the baby sees the world and selamanya. Insyaallah....

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    1. MR,
      Amin. Thanks a lot dear. Appreciate it.

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  6. cekna, i lost 5 babies, memang sedih tahap tak tahu nak cakap macamana dah...

    semoga di lindungi Allah dan di permudahkan segala urusan, amin

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    1. Kak Ummi,
      Ye ker sis? Sedihnya. Tau tak the reason for the miscarriage? Alhamdulillah, sekarang you have 3 girls already kan. Amin. Thanks for your du'a.

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    2. dunno what were the reason for the miscarriages ... awal pregnancy kena ambik jab every week, kuatkan rahim until 4 months.

      Alhamdullilah, syukur sangat dengan 3 angels tu :)

      itu yang akak selalu kena jab dan every week check up, 35 weeks mesti bersalin, tak boleh lebih dari tu sebab banyak risiko...

      jangan risau, doa dan amalkan segala zikir dan surah

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  7. Angah, pls take care.. InsyaAllah everything gonna be fine. keep the faith stronger than ever. You and Uncle has gone thru quite a lot.. I know both of you can surpass this ordeal. So glad to hear that the baby is healthy. To my anak sedara, stay strong little one, be gentle to your mother and I can't wait to see you.. :)

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    1. Thank you Long. Doa2 kan cekna and your anak sedare ni sehat eh. Risau tak habis lagi sebenarnya tapi, cubalah bertenang dan berdoa banyak2. U take care too and all the best for your studies and exams.

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  8. oowwhh dear..

    speechless nih..

    adik aku kat jepun, baru gugur at 6 months..baby tu baby boy plak (she has 2 girls already)..so, dia mmg nak sgt2 baby nih..tapi tulah, takde rezeki..dia cerita, masa keluarkan baby tu, semuanya dh ada..tgn, muka, kaki..cuma tang pusat jek nmpak shrink n hitam skit..berat dah 500gm..owwhh sedihnya..

    sbb dlm family kitaorg (aku, adik n mak), tak pernah ada kejadian keguguran..tu yg sedih..nak2 dia jauh..kalo dekat, mak aku kata dh terbang pi peluk anak dia tuh..

    so, ko jgn sedih yer..twin B tak berapa sihat, sbb tu Allah amik balik..n Allah bagi yg sihat tu terus membesar utk jadikan ko dan Ed as ibu n ayah..

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    Replies
    1. Oren,

      Adehh ni yang aku risau nih. At 6 months pon leh gugur lagi. Ingatkan the risk is high masa awal2 pregnancy jek. Betul, Allah tau apa yang terbaik untuk kita kan. I guess Twin B memang tak sihat, so Allah tak izinkan dia ke dunia nih. Takpelah I still got my strong healthy baby ni. This baby is a fighter insyallah.

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  9. Insyaallah beb, kalo dh tertulis, mmg rezki korg anak ni, amk yg positif ye, kurg2 awal2 baby 2 x survive. At least u x attach sgt ngn bb. Allah tau ape yg terbaik utk kiter. Maybe kalo dia lahir pon dia x sihat. Doa byk2 ye utk another bb tu. insyallah ok semuanyer. Ni pon note to myself gak. Asal check up cuak. Baca kes org gugur pas 4 bln ke ataspon cuak. Tp byk2kan doa n stay positif as possible ye sis.

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    1. Thanks sis. Memangla cuak baca pasal miscarriage kan. Kena pu;lak cam aku nih awal lagi. Takut jugak. So baca tyu untuk elak daripada buat mender2 yang boleh mendatangkan akibat buruk la. Bukan la obses sangat. U take care too ok. Nanti malam sikit, I check out ur blog ok.

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  10. Hi kak Arena,

    Like i said ur blog seem to be inspirational fr me.. haha. I did beta on 30th Apr 2012, wic was (9dp5dt). I had 21 matured eggs picked up, 17 were fertilized n 5 made it to blastocycst stage... thy transfrd 2 blast. My beta came back positive (9dp5dt), 179. Of cz lukin at d num it was confirmed very pregnant... bt u knw wat kak, i dun feel pregnant at all... d oli thing is dat im hungry every 1 hour.. practically 1 hour gap.. its crazy. i mean i have no other symtm at all.. no nausea , no vomiting, no nothing.. nw im worried if thy have stopd growing o wat... i kknw hw crazy n paranoid we get wen it comes to this cz dahla nak conceive pun susah n now dah conceive, duno if it sustains.. makes me worried lak... gota go fr scan again on 9th may for 5 weeks check up.. hope all iz wel.. :(.... Im sorry to hear abt ur loss, bt thn again god blessed u wt one beautfl surviving baby.. GBU n i hope n pray all d best fr u s wel.. haha.. hope we cud recognize each otr if terserempak at d clinic.. haha TC kak..

    Vats

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    1. Hi Vats.

      Owh congratulations, thats good news indeed. SUkanyeee dengar. Actually kan sis, I nausea tu about 2-3 weeks jek, lepas tu I am fine. So sekarang ni kekadang I don't feel pregnant sangat. CUma my tummy has started showing a bit. Hehehe. But since my breast are still sore and my back cepat lenguh, I anggap tu sebagai a good sign. I know susah utk tak risau kan. Masa I br tau pregnant tu, sikit2 gi toilet check takut bleeding hahaha. Sekarang ni, dah kurang la but still anxious jugak. Nanti you go for your 5 weeks checkup inform I on the findings ye. Saje seronok nak tau heheh. I hope everything goes well with your pregnancy sis. You take care. Banyakkan resting ok.

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    2. Yeah, s u said... its imposble to not worry... sure ill let u knw.. jz as i was happy fr u wen i read abt ur updates ... hahahha.. n it inspired me to write a blog s well sebab i was waiting fr a successful cycle so dat u cud post...wic nvr hapnd in 4 yrs...i hope d findings r positive... u tc s well.. lukin frwrd fr d check up.

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    3. Hope everything goes well in your next checkup. If you do blog about the journey, dont forget to invite me ok. Take care.

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  11. hhehe..cekna ..laki ke pompuan...? hahhaha.... over plak....
    btw....Allah knows the best..... syukur......

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    1. Too early to know la sis. Yup Allah knows best. Syukur sangat2.

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  12. Salam arena,

    moga dipermudahkan segalanya tuk both u n bb yea..
    ceria2 sllu lah..i pun ms preggy mmg xtgk citer2 sedih..citer2 seram..
    asik duk ulang youtube juara raja lwak 2 time tu...hehehe

    eyyza

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    Replies
    1. Tulah malas nak nengok cerita sedih2 dan violent2 kan. Tapi tak minat sangat maharaja lawak tu. minat errr cerita romantic comedy hehehe. Jiwang la sangat kan.

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  13. Alhamdulillah..semoga semuanya dipermudahkan untuk ko, baby dan apak baby. nanti2 dah gerak lagi best!!!

    teruskan jaga kesihatan ko cekna. walaupun ko rasa kuat ke larat ke..buat2 la tak larat, manja2kan la diri ok...for your precious one kan..

    Aku paham sangat perasaan sedih ilang baby. Aku rasa 2 kali. One at 8 weeks, another at 12 weeks..tapi semua yang jadi kat kita ada hikmah kan..Allah bagi apa kita perlu..bukan apa kita nak sebab apa yang kita nak mungkin tak elok untuk kita..

    So beb...enjoy your pregnancy to the max!!

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    1. Angah,

      Yes syukur alhamdulillah. Risau tu tetap ada sis. Nak2 baca cerita kawan2 yang at 4-6 months pon masih ada yang miscarry. Tulah kena banyak doa2 jelah kan.

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  14. Aku doakan semuanya ok pasni..Aminn

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    1. Amin. Babe, bila nak berupdatenya blog ko tuh? hahahha

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  15. Cekna,
    Syahdu baca pasal the lost twin :(.
    Tak pe, kuatkan semangat (eventho I can't even say or imagine what you both must have felt).

    Semoga baby membesor sebagai johan :). Take care!

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    1. Thank you sis. Doakan yang baik2 utk kami ye.

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  16. Sekarang yang paling penting


    jangan dok risau-risau sangat.
    nanti effect baby pulak .....

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    1. Kak PB,

      Betul tu kak PB, Saya akan cuba untuk bertenang, errr walaupun susah.

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  17. Allah lebih tahu yg terbaik utk hambanya
    bertenang ye

    ReplyDelete